Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
