So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
