i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I need mimosas to revive my soul
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
