were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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