He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
