Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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