Nicole vs. Life
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
