That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
