Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize