YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
