youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
How external is "for external use only"?
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
