WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
