How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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