I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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