I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
