barbara walters just said penis...
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
my liver is dry heaving
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
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