You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
