with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
