Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
