still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
