So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
