This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
