HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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