Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
