you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
