it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
