Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
