No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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