Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
