ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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