Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Im part way to drunk.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
