i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
