he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
