Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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