There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Randomize
