It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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