If i come over, it means nothing
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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