chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
being pregnant is like rehab
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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