i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
