Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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