Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
ttyl tear gas
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
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