Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
