That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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