HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
