we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
