What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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