sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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