I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
