Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
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