It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
They took my balls.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
just found out that she named her cat after me.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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