I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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